pain

tonight, i am irreversibly, inexplicably, and undeniably sad. almost every night, no matter what kind of wonderful day i've had, i get really lonely, and i usually cry. it's kind of depressing, and i always go to sleep right after. i can't help it though, it just happens. there's nothing redemptive about my tears, no solution at the end of the night, just a postponing for the return of it tomorrow. i even have a playlist of songs to go with my mood. nobody knows i do this.

this was the sunset tonight. i watched it while listening to john mayer, and i had a fabulous night with some of my closest friends. there really wasn't any reason for me to want to get home so badly so that i could cry my eyes out. some nights, i try to find some solace, some kind of light at the end of the tunnel. tonight, it's this:

"i am not what happened to me. i am what i choose to become."

-carl jung

embrace the darkness, it makes the light so much more beautiful.
sarah∞mae